LiTtLeBeE ♥

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Welcome to LittleBee's World!
Enjoy life to the fullest! (:

Bad Day with Tears.

Crystals started to form in my eyes this afternoon.
First time to be in Central Station. Yet another new environment and new work pace for me. Another period of shock after managing to get through the previous shock of being in a new ward. Haiz. Life is just so difficult. Especially in this working life whereby people can't be trusted 100%. But when you're new, you tend to just trust the seniors. Haiz.
Anyways, today I had a hard time managing course in the morning, my seniors kept calling me to do this and that. Without knowing Im only ONE person with A PAIR OF HANDS. Of course I can't do everything at the same time! But why can't they see it?! Damn it la! I just hate it. I know Im new but why must they make me like this?! Im no longer a STUDENT whereby they can just USE me to do their stuffs. Im still learning to cope with the new responsibilities of a STAFF NURSE! They think Im what?! ANIMAL?! Damn it la!
After a hard morning, I still had to endure another hard time in the afternoon even after passed over report was done to the afternoon shift. So that just made me much free and able to go home on time right? But NO! I was hold back to do a dressing at a last minute! She should have told me earlier to do the dressing for her but didn't! Like purposely sia! I can't take it with all these crap! Not at all that. While doing dressing, I was scolded by the patient course she felt pain when I opened her bandage. She said "If you didn't do properly until I feel pain, I'll kick you out of here!". Damn it la! I was being left alone to handle the situation. I almost cried while doing the dressing but had to control it. Ended everything at 415pm. Without telling any staffs, I just left the ward after signing off.
Glad I met Sharon in the staff toilet. Haiz. Both of us had a hard time and tears flowing down our cheeks today. Haiz. I burst into tears in my room as soon as I reached home. Nobody knows about what happened today except Sharon. We understand each others' feelings as we are in the same boat. Still struggling. Trying not to drown. Haiz.

Ya Allah.. Berikanlah petunjuk dan kekuatan kepada hamba Mu yang lemah ini.
I really hope to succeed in life. Never wanna let my loved ones down. Please God help me. That's all I can ask for.

Strength to carry on.